Marry Your Best Friend

Teenage life is full of dreams. One of the things that fill the mind of a teenager is career prospects. Young people dream of special careers. It is rare to find any adolescent hoping for the lowest jobs in society. They point out celebrities. "I want to be like that one," they say. Another interesting topic of discussion during this phase of life is marriage. What kind of a lady will I marry? What will she look like? Will the man who marries me cook for me? Will he be opening doors for me before I come out of the car or enter a room? We all asked these questions at some point. The truth is that while it is good to desire someone who will do the good things for you, this must not be your main focus. You need to look for deeper things. The rest of the qualities will come as icing on the cake. What then should you look for in a marriage partner? What you need is a companion suitable for you. You need a best friend.

On a magnet, the positive attracts the negative. In like manner, God designed men to be attracted to women and vice versa because they are different. Yes, different but equal. There is a friend, scripture tells us, who sticks closer than a brother. It makes it even better when you have a best friend who is also your husband or wife. A best friend will tell you when he is upset. A best friend will tell you when your hair looks horrible or when your makeup is too much. A best friend will rejoice with you when you succeed. A best friend always wants the best for you. A best friend wants to spend time with you. A best friend will love you sincerely. A best friend will gently rebuke you when necessary. A best friend will be kind to you. A best friend will respect you.

When God said let me make for Adam a companion suitable for him, he was creating a best friend for Adam. He was creating someone who would be attracted to Adam. God was creating someone who would support Adam in his God-given tasks. If she is your best friend, she will respect you. You don't have to plead for her submission. If he is your best friend, he will seek the best for you. He will protect and provide for you. You don't have to ask him to open doors for you as you get into your car. He will do it because he cares. He is your best friend. If she is your best friend, she will see to it that she helps you in your calling. Remember, she is your best friend. She will stick closer than a brother.

If he is your best friend, then you will agree with him at least on doctrinal grounds. It may not be everything, but most of it. Amos asks a rhetorical question when he says, "Can two walk together unless they are agreed?" (Amos 3:3). Your best friend must agree with your personality. Your best friend will accept your flaws and seek to help you with them. Your best friend should be friends with someone greater and special. He should be friends with Jesus. Marry your best friend.

My Idol Pastor

When Pastor X is preaching, the auditorium is filled to capacity but when Pastor Y is on the Pulpit, the Church building is almost empty. Why is it so? Could it be that Pastor Y is not articulate? Or is it that Pastor Y has not been to Bible College? Or maybe Pastor Y is only five years in the ministry? What could be the problem behind this reality which tearing the Churches? Note that I am not referring to health and wealth kind of preaching. I know that has its effects as well. In fact, it has done more harm. However, I am talking about sound expository preaching coming from sound doctrine. Why do we have people making choices as to which preacher they will listen to? My conclusion is that there is a particular sin which has blinded believers from appreciating other preachers.

I know that going to Bible school has a lot of advantages and many people who preach well can tell you that they have been greatly assisted by the studies they have gone through on individual level or university level. I can testify that I was helped to a great extend. Paul tells Timothy to study in order to show himself approved. Bible school is like pouring gasoline on fire. The person already has the passion to preach and adding knowledge to it makes the passion more visible.

I know also that people are gifted differently. There are some who are more gifted than others. I can sing and so can many other people but I cannot compare my singing to some people I know. When they sing, it’s just out of this world. I say, “Wow, that is so good. My heart has been warmed.”

I know also that some preachers have little dependence on the help of the Holy Spirit. Some also have lives that are morally wrong. God surely will not be pleased and later on work in such a life.

However, a lack or an absence of these things is not the only reason people shun to go to Church when Pastor Y takes up the pulpit. I noticed something that is encroaching into the Church. It is the sin of idolatry. Believers have made certain preachers to be their gods. They have said to themselves, “I can only be taught by Pastor X and he is the only one who can speak the truth.” The Church no longer holds the Scriptures with high esteem. People have become greater than the Scriptures. The Scriptures are not seen as God’s very word. It’s like that book title, “When God is small and people are BIG.” What we should know is that God can use anyone despite the level of giftedness. It is because we have told our minds and hearts that only preacher X is good enough. We don’t say it but we live it. This is a deadly sin. It is such sins that have led to people forsaking the assembling of believers together. The Church at Corinth was going through these difficulties of choosing which preacher to listen to. This is what Paul tells them: “What then is Appollos? What then is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. I planted, Appollos watered, but God gave the growth…for we are God’s fellow workers. You are God’s field, God’s building” 1 Corinth 3:5-9. In chapter four verse 1 he says, “This is how one should regard us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God.”

God can use anyone. If only we can cease to idolize certain preachers, we would see the work of God in the preaching of others.